Not Every Act of Kindness Is a Signal

I once had a friend—let’s call her Brianna. She was one of those people who carried light wherever she went. The kind to remember small details about others, send check-in messages just because, and give without expecting anything in return.

She had a way of making people feel seen, and naturally, many mistook it for something more.

“You’re leading people on,” someone told her once. “You’re too nice.”

She laughed it off, but I saw the way her smile faded a little.

When did kindness become an invitation? When did showing love start meaning, I want something deeper from you?

Brianna never saw friendships as stepping stones to something else. She valued people for who they were, not for what they could become in her life. But the world around her seemed to believe that if a person—especially a woman—was too kind, too thoughtful, too present, it must mean she was sending a signal.

The truth is, some connections are simply meant to stay at the friendship stage. And that’s perfectly fine. Not every shared moment needs to turn into romance. Some people love freely because it’s who they are—not because they’re trying to build an emotional debt.

Learn to see people beyond romance. Learn to appreciate kindness without assuming there’s a hidden motive. Some people are just good to others because that’s what love—real, godly love—looks like.

And that should be enough.

Have you ever had a friendship where kindness was misinterpreted? How did you handle it? Let’s discuss.